Friday, September 16, 2005

My Week of Living Veganously

Every once in a while, RR and I get crazy ideas. You know, ideas that are “just so crazy, it might work,” type crazy. Usually they do not actually work. That does not deter us. I see that as a good thing. We take a lickin’ and keep on tickin’, and it’s people like that, that make the world go round, people like that who make things happen, and people like that who figure out how to get keyboards working again after being doused in coffee.

This week’s crazy idea was to go vegan. RR and I, despite our terrible eating habits (and I mean, terrible to an embarrassing degree), do have aspirations to being those annoyingly healthy people who bring carrot sticks to movie-watching parties—and just carrot sticks (or something akin), not carrot sticks AND queso AND cookies. So periodically, we force ourselves to be semi-healthy for a short period of time. Also, in general, I eat far more dairy than any one person should (and visions of diverticulitis danced in her head). This week, I thought to myself, surely it would be good for us to eschew meat and dairy, if just for a week?

Probably it would have been, but of course we’ll never know, because I cannot be vegan. I’m not buying the special bread that is not made with whey, if such a thing exists. I’m just not. But I did decide that I could give up cheese and milk—well, plain milk. I wasn’t going to avoid things that had milk in them—I wasn’t giving up the dairy for ethical reasons, but only because I have too much dairy in my diet. Anyway.

Sunday: Had coffee at parents’ house (they have nondairy creamer). Had Amy’s Organic Rice and Beans Burrito (non-dairy) for lunch and dinner.

Monday: Had to wait to get coffee until I got to work because did not have nondairy creamer at home as that stuff is gross and I will not have it in my house. Jes noticed me pouring the powdery stuff into my coffee and asked me if I was lactose intolerant, thus confirming my belief that I was not going to be able to avoid explaining to people my weird goal for the week. Had peanut butter sandwich and fruit for lunch and Amy’s non-dairy enchiladas for dinner.

Tuesday: Forgot lunch, had to buy lunch from school eating establishment, which consisted of a grilled vegetable sandwich. [My friend (and fellow cheese lover) asked why I couldn’t just have a sandwich, or any of the salads with cheese on them.] Picked off most of the vegetables and just ate the croissant and potato chips, thus confirming my belief that I was trading one bad eating habit for another. Clearly if I wasn’t eating meat and cheese, I was eating everything else--I never eat potato chips.

Amy’s non-dairy enchiladas for dinner. The worst part of the day was the no coffee (no nondairy creamer at home and the closest school establishment selling coffee and providing nondairy creamer doesn’t take cash or accept credit cards for purchases of less than $3). I had to compensate with DP—which I love, but not first thing in the morning. Sugar in the morning, bad.

Wednesday: Another DP morning. Sandwich at lunch was damp (?!!), so ate ritz crackers and m&ms instead. Had soup for dinner.

Thursday: I cracked. Walked to Starbucks and bought a non-fat, with-whip mocha. Had PIZZA for dinner with extra cheese. OD’ed on M&Ms.

Today (Friday): Repentant. Am currently drinking coffee with nondairy creamer. Blueberry muffin for breakfast (actually, just the top of one). PB sandwich for lunch. Soup will be dinner.

Unsurprisingly, after five days as a quasi-vegan, I don’t feel any healthier.


Amstaff Mom said...

So this proves the theory that being vegan and being healthy are not always the same thing. I can go veggie for several days and not miss a beat. Then I start craving taco meat or something and it's all over. Come to think of it, I haven't eaten any meat since Wednesday night. And that includes today's lunch.
Vegan is a whole other story, I can't do vegan. At all. No ice cream?!?! Are you kidding me? And don't give me that soy stuff either instead of real ice cream either. That would make it worse. Besides, me and organic cheese are like this (*twists forefinger and middle finger together*).
Bravo to you for trying, but I don't blame you for waving the white flag. I'm all for organic, but buying Amy's Enchiladas gets boring after awhile, and expensive.

Did RR try too?

brapf! (sounds like a belch!)

JLR said...

RR did indeed attempt to participate.

She had pizza last night with me.

gjdgt (which looks like gidget!)

Amstaff Mom said...

So there were two white flags waving then. What a sight that must have been. :)

sroalx! (it's a rolex?)

steve said...

This CRACKED ME UP!! Od'ed on M and M's!! Nice!

Meeekdni! (I enherit the earth)

Katie said...

SOGGY SANDWICH - I had to stop reading at that moment and dry heave for a good 10 seconds. Came back and finished - ahahaha, I remember you telling us that you were a dairy lover.

Ben said...

I could never be a Vegan.

People are crazy... animals are for EATING people.

But nice attempt JLR... but come back over to the "Darkside."

uhgejicr - That means eating vegetables will give you an ulcer in Latvian. ... okay, there isn't such a language as "latvian." But if there was... that's what it would mean.

JLR said...

There's no such language as latvian? Then what's this: