Wednesday, November 12, 2008

You only thought this would be interesting instead of gross

[organ music intro]
And now, this week's installment of . . . Overshare Theater!

So, I think I have a sinus infection, which apparently you cannot defeat with just denial and self-will. Saturday, I felt like my face might actually explode. I mean, I know it’s crazy, and I knew it was a crazy-town thought when I thought it (and heaven knows, I try to stay out of Crazy Town), but I actually did think that my face may actually explode.

Thank the Lord for my trusty neti pot, and let me tell you (and here’s where the oversharing happens), the stuff that comes out of my sinuses was deeskusteeng. And colors that it isn’t supposed to be unless you’re sick. And it only made a difference to the sinus pressure for maybe 10 seconds. So Saturday, that was fun.

Then Sunday I woke up all sniffly and sneezy and gross in that way, but at least the sinus pressure was gone. So, good, I thought, it’s breaking up. And apparently it was, because Monday I woke up bone-tired and with a sore throat. So, good, I thought, it’s draining.

Yesterday I still felt tired and achy. I did have to go to the mall with my sister and my mom to buy shoes, and rr kept looking and me and suggesting to my mom that they “put me down.” She said that she just meant that I could sit somewhere while they shopped, but her face totally had a “put her out of her misery” look on it.

So today, I don't have a sore throat, but trust me when I say that I am still draining down the back of my throat, and I know this because . . . it's gross, just trust me, it's something I'm very aware of. I drank a lot of coffee today and chewed a lot of mints, is all I'm saying. And I'm wondering when all of this is just going to go away.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch . . .

So, my cat keeps throwing up hair balls. Today, he threw up two. He’s never been much for that. Sure, he has all kinds of food allergies and digestion problems, but hair balls, that was never his problem, just an occasional occurrence. Now, lately, I don’t know what’s going on. I think maybe he ate another cat or something. I don’t know where all that hair is coming from.

It's a fun thing to wake up to that in the morning. But at least today was the first time in a loooong time that I got up on time. But I still did not get to work on time (well, technically it was on time, but I consider that late) because it took me an hour and a half to get ready. If you saw me at work today, and the fabulousity I had going on (see: sarcasm), you would have wondered where all that time went. And I will tell you. I spent a lot of quality time in the bathroom with the neti pot. And still today, I had to have all that coffee. Yummy!

This concludes another thrilling installment of Overshare Theater! Join us next week when JLR talks about how huge her backside has become!

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Mom smokes in the car. Jesus is ok with it, but we can’t tell Dad.

Ok, now that all the shows (except 30 Rock) have had their series premiers, I get to talk about them. Yea t.v.!

So, my thoughts, for the two of you that still read my blog.

Big Bang Theory:
Still think it’s funny. One thought, though—a little less Sheldon, please, and a little more adorable Leonard (who is the type of nerd that I would date in real life–he’s not totally devoid of social skills, he just likes sci fi and has no sense of fashion). Don’t get me wrong, the Sheldon character is funny, very funny, and the actor playing him made me laugh out loud in the season premiere. But it’s not The Sheldon Show, and I’m worried that eventually the “he just doesn’t know people at all” schtick will get old or annoying if that’s what every single episode revolves around or depends on for humor. I don’t want them to ruin my Monday night, so I hope they fix it.

The character of Chuck is so cute. He’s another one that I don’t get why he’s single. So cute! And so sweet! In real life, that guy would have had a girlfriend by now. Casey continues to dominate my list of fictional characters that I might like to have as friends. Yes, he's sort of crazy and yes, he will kill you in a heartbeat if it means saving the country, but he calls a spade a spade and doesn't worry about whether you'll still like him if he's honest. I think I have a bit of a crush on him. And Sarah has really grown on me. I never disliked her before, but I wasn't rooting for her. Now I think she's just as cute as Chuck in a sophisticated, nerd-at-heart kind of way. Love this show still.

Samantha Who.
I love how this show has lots of embarrassment without ever crossing the line into so awkward that I can't watch (known in my head as the "British Office line"). I’m so glad it’s back. Christina Applegate is fab-u-lous, as is everyone else on the show.

Pushing Daisies.
This show of course continues to be must-see-t.v. for me. There’s just nothing else like it on t.v. It’s quirky, it’s sweet, it’s visually stunning, it’s laugh-out-loud funny, and it’s perfectly cast. If you don’t watch this show because you think it’s too "out there," you need to adjust your boundaries. There aren’t many shows on television that can surprise you, but this one does, and it’s worth watching just for that. And Emerson Cod, he's also on my list of fictional characters I kinda want to be friends with.

Still good, very excited that it’s back, but I am worried about how well it will do in the ratings. I have missed the Crews/Reese interaction. They are probably my favorite team on television, romantic or (as in their case) otherwise, even more than Ned and Chuck, Ned and Emerson, or Casey and Chuck. And in this past week’s episode, they established this season’s over-arching mystery right at the end, and I got all giddy inside in anticipation. I can’t wait to see how they play it out. If you haven't been watching the show, get the season 1 dvd and start at the beginning. It will grow on you.

And for the only new show on my t.v. watch list right now, My Own Worst Enemy.
I wasn’t sure if I was going to like this, but because it had Christian Slater, I decided to give it a chance. Who didn’t love Heathers and Pump Up the Volume as a teenager? Well, I mean, who in my age group didn’t? Those were movies of our generation. (Now, of course, I watch Pump Up the Volume and think how glad I am not to be at the age where you really think the whole world is against you. But Heathers, I don’t scoff at) And, also, though RR and I may be the only two people on the planet who would say this, I even loved Kuffs. Mr. Slater has always worked for me (although I never did see that Untamed Heart movie, and I hope I never have to). So, the show. For the few part of the show, I wasn’t sure I was going to like it. But somewhere in the middle, it got me. And caused me to swear loudly at the stupid converter box when the picture cut out for a few seconds. I will definitely be tuning back in. Several of the reviews I’ve read, people seemed to prefer Edward over Henry—not me. A man who loves his wife and kids and is happy with a life that doesn’t involve saving the world, I find that very sexy. And Christian Slater pulls that off. We already knew he could play perfectly a charming psychopath (see: Heathers), but I think I like this side of him.

Thoughts? Anyone?

In non-television related news, work is still beating me down, I have no life outside of work and television, my allergies are still making me feel like dirt, and I still don't even have time to check out my favorite websites or blog. So still nothing interesting to report. But I miss all you guys!

Over and out.

Friday, September 19, 2008

Avast! 'Tis Talk Like a Pirate Day!

Ahoy, mateys

Well, you knew I’d post something today, right? I HAVE to post on Talk Like a Pirate Day.

In honor of the occasion, I decided to make some food to take to work. I was particularly proud of the Pirates of the Carob Bean Oatmeal Bars. Not the bars themselves, the name I gave them. I just decided I needed to make something with that name and found a recipe that called for carob.

A few things about boiling carob powder, milk, and butter: it splatters, and it stinks.

I mean, a lot. Both those things a lot. It got everywhere, and then everywhere stank.

Anyway, that one wasn’t so much a success. Then I tried to make darrrk chocolate cookies, but I managed to burn them. And, oh yeah, I got my thumb caught in the mixer. At least it was a hand-held and not the Kitchen Aid, and I had a split second warning as it caught the spatula and started to roll up the handle towards me, so I managed to turn it off before it got too bad.

In other news, work is . . . meh, it’s work. I started to get caught up, but of course that didn’t last. And my close friends mostly all have left for other employment. Le sigh. Today I managed to get out of going with my boss to get barbecue at a liquor store in a questionable part of town. At a liquor store. I ask you. I’m so glad I already had plans. Besides, even if it weren’t at a liquor store, yes, I’ll say it—Texas barbecue is just not all that.

So there.

Let’s see, a lot has happened since my last post. For example: THE OLYMPICS. I love the summer olympics. USA! USA! USA!

And anyway. You know what hasn’t changed? My allergies. Still sniffling, still sneezing, still feel like someone is crushing my face in with a vice.

And now a word about the Hurricane Ike situation: all of y’all who stayed behind, you ought to be charged the cost of your rescue. I don’t want to hear anyone complaining about how you don’t have water, or you don’t have ice (as my mom said: I guess you’ll have to drink your beer warm), or you don’t have a working sewer system, or whatever. You didn’t leave. They said to leave, and you didn’t. When a storm with a size estimate of between 600 and 800 miles is bearing down on your little island, and the storm surge is expected to be about 20 feet, you GET OUT. And if you don’t, you’ve got no one else to blame but yourself. Even all the way up here in this part of the state, we were making plans for major winds and rain (and the inevitable flooding). The only ones I feel sorry for are the ones who didn’t have the money to get off the island, but even then only the ones who literally did not have enough money on hand for gas, not the ones who were thinking that hotel bills would be too pricey. ‘Cause when they say, basically, “leave or die,” isn’t sleeping in your car in a parking lot that isn’t under water an acceptable option?

TV: Yea, tv starts again next week! I know, technically it started already, but none of the shows that I watch have started up. Except CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT DYLAN IS THE FATHER OF KELLY’S BABY? Geez Louise. I didn’t even watch 90210 after the first season, I couldn’t believe how much people actually liked it now matter how stupid it was, and I still would have rather it was Brandon.

That is all.

Oh, except, go forth and celebrate the day in an appropriate fashion, me hearties.

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

On Bugs, Daniel Craig, and Being Oh-So-Tie-Tie

Helllloooo. Man, I'm tired. I am so tie-tie. Yes, that's right, I'm so tired that I'm calling it "tie-tie." That's what we normally say to the cat in that high-pitched, talking-to-the-baby voice. "Aaawwww, Wawwy's tie-tie." But now I have started using the word for myself. I just walk around the town house saying, "I am so tie-tie." And for the record, I do not like people who use baby talk in everyday conversation. And yet.

Why, you ask, am I so tired?

For NOTHING. No reason at all. I'm just tired all the frakkin' time without getting anything out of it.

And that's enough of the complaining.

Not a whole heck of lot going on. I'm going to stay at my current job for a while longer, mostly because I like the people I work with and the job market has tanked, so there's not much incentive to get out there. And my friend Hils has a friend M who says that at work recently, a partner (or senior associate, can't remember) was talking to her at work about work with chewing tobacco in his mouth. That's right, chaw. Just totally noncholantly and everything. Like it was no big deal. Noooo big deal. So professional. It makes me gag a little just thinking about it. And it wasn't even in Texas. So you can stereotype Texans all you want, but it just goes to show that no place is safe from clueless bores who have sense of workplace propriety. So, yeah, no real incentive to get out there, seeing as how you never know what you'll get. Except for that tiny little factor that what I'm doing now is not even the slightest bit related to want I want to do. But you know, other than that.

On the homefront, RR and I have had to take care of three, count 'em, three hornets nests this year. We didn't want to kill them, but they were right near the door, which meant just leaving the town house would be invading their territory. And that makes me afeared.

Well, one of them was not by the door, but it was on rr's bicycle, which goes to show how often she rides it. But at least we used poison free wasp killer so as not to harm other living critters, right? Anyway, we have a "spray and run" technique down very well. Also an "open the door, aim and spray, slam the door shut" technique.

Recently we had an encounter with what we hope is a daddy long legs. We can't get close enough to tell for sure. At first we just thought, ew, creepy spider. We didn't want to kill him, though, because our thinking is that if a spider is doing good enough business to keep alive in the spot he's at, that means he taking care of bugs that would otherwise be around there and possibly on you or in your pantry, eating your food. And that is why if you come to my house, you will find undisturbed spiders. It's not that I don't vacuum. Anyway, I didn't want to kill him.

But did I mention he lives right outside and above the front door? Like, as I'm locking the door in the morning, he could just repel down onto my head. This thought freaked me out not a little. And he'd kind of scurry whenever we went in or out, which of course convinced me that he was in fact going to repel on my head. And, like, I wouldn't notice at first. And then I'd get in my car and then notice him. And I would go crazy screaming and swatting at him, and then I would get into a car crash and die. Have you ever had a spider suddenly lower himself into your eye line when you were in the car? Because I have. And it FREAKED ME OUT. And that was a little guy. I know I'd have a heart attack if a spider as big as the (suspected) daddy long legs was in my car, not to mention on my head. So that's what I imagined would happen. Or he'd tag along into the house and then he'd kill me. Because by this time, in my thoughts, he was definitely poisonous and planning something. So I decided to spray him.

Note: mint oil does not kill daddy long legs.

Anyway, after I sprayed him, but before I found out that the spray was ineffective, I decided to see if I could find info on the innernet, and that's when I decided he was a daddy long legs and probably not rubbing his eight legs (or whatever, don't email me) together in anticipation of my impending doom. I felt so bad for trying to kill him, and we were so relieved to discover that's he'd survived. So for the next week or so, whenever I would go in or out the front door, I would look up, check to see if he was still alive, and say, "dude, I'm so sorry."

But now I'm back to being afraid of the repelling. Leaving the house, it's an ordeal for me.

Speaking of anticipation, but this time in a good way, I am very excited about upcoming movies! First and foremost, in November, Quantum of Solace.

CANNOT wait. A coworker of mine, after recently finally getting around to seeing Casino Royale, developed a bit of a crush on Daniel Craig and consequently has tried telling me about Daniel Craig. Like, she'll come in and say, hey, if you like Daniel Craig, you should see blah blah blah. Like I need ANYONE to tell me ANYTHING about Daniel Craig. Daniel Craig, who's full name is Daniel Craig, JLR's Imaginary Boyfriend Since 1997. And I explained this to her. And yet she's still trying to act like there could possibly be some movie that he's been in that I wouldn't know about. Nice try! Poor girl. If she wants him, she has to get in line. Behind me. And behind RR. But I do admire her taste.

And by the way, I am not at all bothered when other women don't agree to me. I just think to myself, 'ok, so, she's not any competition, then.' As though it could be possible that, merely because no other woman on the planet found him attractive, he'd be forced to go out with me. So pathetic.

Anyway, I am also quite interested in seeing Ghost Town.

Some people think the trailer looks terrible, but I dunno, I guess my standards are low. It looks amusing. Plus, the soundtrack features one of my favorite Beatles' tunes.

I don't really have much else going on. RR and I have been spending most of our weekends helping our parents pick out paint colors. It's a tricky task because, due to the way the light comes into the room, it looks like you painted the walls three different colors. And of course, it also changes depending on the time of day. So we have had trouble finding a color that looks the same on all the walls at every (or even at any) time of the day, or a color that looks different but still good on all three walls, or a color that looks different but still good on at least two of the walls at every point during the day. So that's what I've been doing. That, and throwing out old catalogs and hoping my mom won't notice. Thrilling. And they are neutral colors, which I like because they are soothing and make redecorating easy, but I keep picturing Daniel Craig saying that he's not going to spend the rest of his life with a woman whose favorite color is beige. And if you don't know what that's from, then I guess you just don't need to making Daniel Craig movie recommendations to me.

Anyway, I suppose I should go get ready for bed now. If anything interesting actually happens, I will be sure to let you know.

Thursday, May 29, 2008

I'd Like to Go to Bed Right Now, But I Can't Because A Movie I Hate Is On T.V.

Hello! I’ve been busy! But not with anything interesting!

I really needed to get some work done tonight, but I didn’t, thank you very much Hoosiers. Stupid movie. I can’t not watch it.

Speaking of things I can’t not watch, I’m taking my cue from a recent reader poll on asking what movie or t.v. genre they can’t pass up.

I have just a few. One, I cannot pass up documentaries about storm chasers. I don’t know why, probably because I’m terrified of tornadoes. And for the past month, the local PBS station has been showing documentaries about tornadoes and storm chasers on Thursday nights. And so tonight, instead of getting work done, after I watched Hoosiers, I watched yet another documentary.

Two, I will watch anything with Gary Sinise. I am aware that he will not meet everyone’s idea of the Ideal Man, but I find him disturbingly attractive. He fascinates me. Because of him, I watch CSI: New York. I’m even willing to watch Of Mice and Men when it comes on the television, and I hate Steinbeck.

Three, and this will surprise no one, I am absolutely, positively, addicted to mysteries. Which is why, at this moment, instead of getting work done, or getting ready for bed, or doing the dishes, or making up for the extra Z-bar I ate tonight by spending some quality time with the Wii Fit, I’m watching the most recent PBS adaptation of Agatha Christie’s Ordeal By Innocence. For the second time. I hated it the first time, and yet, here I am watching it again. They really did a number on Ms. Christie’s books in the most recent productions they’ve done; they’re terrible. Some of the stories are almost unrecognizable.

And RR and I also always watch when they have the Inspector Lynley mysteries on. The books aren’t bad, but, again, they diverged from them quite a bit in making them for television. Every week, we’d watch an episode, get good and mad, and then, the next week, we’d watch the next episode. Grr. But I can’t not watch!

I am excited, though, that they will soon be airing some more episodes of Foyle’s War. Michael Kitchen. I just love him. He was disarmingly adorable in Enchanted April, and he’s excellent in this series as well. And it’s a good mystery! You should watch.

Anyway. I should go now. I have a mystery to watch and get mad at. Again.

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

All work and no play

Howdy, y'all! I'm boring!

Seriously, I do nothing of interest. My time lately has been consumed with working on a case that has no answer. Fun! Also, eating lots of dried pineapple. The chewiness helps me think.

And so I am obsessed with dried pineapple, which I buy from Central Market. It's in the bulk bin section, which I have a love/hate relationship with. I love the selection and the fact that I can get as much or as little as I want. But I hate the grazers and the people who park themselves in front of the section that I need. I had to deal with both today. And also, everytime I tried to grab a piece of pineapple, the bin lid flipped down and slammed on my hand. It's not heavy, so it didn't hurt, but it was very, very annoying. And then I couldn't get the ziplock bag to close. I got a leetle angry about it. But I did not yell at anyone.

Maybe I should cut back on the coffee.

Hoho, I jest.

So, one of my coworkers, I've developed this Pavlovian response to him--we've taken so many coffee breaks together that now if I see him walking down the hall with a coffee mug in his hand, I am compelled to go get more coffee.

On a completely unrelated note, my hand has felt and weak and jittery, for lack of better descriptors, for the past two days. I do not know what that is about.

And about work. My boss has been working from home for the last six weeks, recovering from surgery. It has been awesome. I love being in charge of my own schedule, and by that, I mean I love knowing that I will be able to get work done during the day and not have to spend an hour looking at a clothing catalog talking about non-work things. I love that she's not a workaholic who demands that your every thought be about The Law, but I really would prefer to be in my office on Westlaw. Anyway, she'll be back in the office starting next week, and it will be good to see her, but I will miss being in control of my own time. I think I'm going to start doing a lot of work in the library.

So, moving on, we are trying to get the cat on a raw food diet. But we're starting him on cooked chicken first to get him used to eating chicken, and then we'll slowly move him over to raw chicken. It's kind of sad when your cat's food costs more than yours. The good news is, he likes it, mostly. But we also have to limit feeding him to just a few times a day rather than leaving food out for him all day, so by the time the morning comes, he's quite hungry. So he comes into my room (only mine--he doesn't bother RR) and meows at me. He also will stand on my pillow (because I hate that), or my bladder, or, you know, my neck. Whatever he thinks will get me out of bed. I don't like this new side to him. And then I get into this totally pathetic power struggle with him, wherein I cannot let him win or believe that his bugging me will work, and so I will stay in bed even longer just to spite him and prove to him that standing on my neck won't make me get up and feed him. And then I feel guilty because I know he's really hungry. But I am not reasonable when you wake me up in the morning, so then I have this internal debate with myself about whether I should get up or whether that would just encourage him. So because of this battle of wills that I'm imagining I'm having with my cat, I have been late to work almost every day for the past two weeks.

But so anyway, now my townhouse's downstairs frequently smells like chicken. I don't care for that. Tonight my sink had this very strange, hard to describe smell, like maybe oily metallic. . . chicken . . . peppers . . . sour cream . . . thing. (Ok, the sour cream and peppers were from my dinner, but the rest, I don't know). I didn't cook any chicken tonight, so I don't know why it smells like that.

And also, my trash can? Smells like vomit. SMELLS.LIKE.VOMIT. We've only had it for a few weeks, and I swear no one has thrown up in there. What the hell, y'all?


And now back to work.

Thursday, April 10, 2008

And so it continues

Others have started noticing the coffee brewing carelessness that’s rampant around here. My two coffee drinking buddies (one of whom has an office right by the break room and so has a great opportunity to solve this little mystery) noticed yesterday, without me even being in the room to point it out, that an empty coffee pot was stuck on the burning hot burner and left there to explode. Fortunately, they noticed it before the exploding part happened. We had a brief conversation trying to figure out why this is happening, how anyone who worked here couldn't know that empty coffee pot + heat source = bad things. One of said coworkers wondered if someone was “messing with us.” My thoughts exactly, my friend.

Of course, now that Someone has branched out and taken to leaving the little door to the butter section open in the refrigerator so that the stuff that’s in there (including a granola bar that’s been in there for at least a year) will go flying out if you open the refrigerator door to quickly. I close the section door, but when I come back later, it’s open again. And this morning, when I closed it, saving the old granola bar from certain expulsion? I noticed that someone had put an egg in there. An egg, y’all. I think it might be a boiled egg, but still. AN EGG. Tell me that someone isn’t messing with me.

At least one of my coffee buddies is humoring me and will close the butter section door whenever he sees it open. I don’t care if he’s doing it to mock me ("Hey, [JLR], I just want you to know that today, I saw that little door open, and I closed it. I'm defending you."), whatever, I’ll take it.

Monday, April 07, 2008

"Don't Let a Suitcase Full of Cheese Be Your Big Fork and Spoon"

I love movies, and I love television. I’ll watch just about anything but reality shows (I will watch some of those, but pretty much just the ones on Bravo, ANTM, and Celebrity Mole. Yes, Celebrity Mole. Shut up.). But although I don’t generally like movies that play to the lowest common denominator–I hate Dumb & Dumber, There’s Something About Mary, generally almost anything with Ben Stiller–I don’t only like art films. I’m not a snob. After all, I have a well-documented love for the movie Clue. But Clue is not the only movie that won’t win an Oscar that I’m not afraid to admit I love.

Five Movies I’m Not Ashamed to Love
1. Clue. Well, obviously this one was going on the list.
2. Troop Beverly Hills.
3. Overboard. RR and I like this movie so much that we watched the Korean t.v. series that was based on it (and we really liked that one, too).
4. Weekend at Bernie's. I know. But I love it. So shut up.
5. The ‘Burbs. “‘Bout a nine on the old tension scale, there, Rube.” I can’t explain how much I love this movie. Maybe it’s because I grew up in the suburbs and can relate to so much of this movie. Maybe it’s the great performance by Corey Feldman–yes, Corey Feldman. Maybe it’s because it has both Bruce Dern and Carrie Fisher. But whatever the reason, this movie has so many lines that my entire family quotes on a regular basis. "I've never seen that. I've never seen anyone drive their trash to the curb and then bang the hell out of it with a stick. I've never seen that." If this movie is on television, I am watching it.

And it’s not just movies. I’m not afraid to love tv shows that may or may not ever be a critical fave. For example, let’s take The Big Bang Theory. Ok, yes, I realize that this show isn’t Seinfeld. And when the previews came out, I thought it looked like the stupidest show ever. But it grew on me, starting with “The Big Bran Hypothesis.” Consider me a fan.

And speaking of television, you know how some movies you love but can only watch every once in a while, while others you could watch every week and never get tired of them (yep, I’m talking about Clue again)? I’m like that with certain episodes of television as well.

Just a few of my favorite t.v. episodes:
1. “The Key,” Yes, Prime Minister. To truly appreciate this episode, you have to have watched Yes, Prime Minister (preferably starting back when it was Yes, Minister) and develop an understanding of the relationship among the prime minister, Sir Humphrey, and Bernard. But even if you haven’t done that, you can still enjoy watching it. RR and I still say “people would see people” on a frequent basis. I’ve long wondered why someone didn’t take this show, tweak it, and launch it in the U.S. While the show is very British, I think the premise is sound and could definitely be made to work here with a little effort. We could use it.
2. “Baggage,” Everybody Loves Raymond. As I’ve previously stated, it’s worth watching the whole episode to see Patricia Heaton say, “If smells bothered me, I’d have left him a long time ago.” And of course, “Cheese. I love it, yet I used it as a weapon” and the title of this post (which RR and I quote quite often). We are always on the lookout for an opportunity to warn someone not to let a suitcase full of cheese be their big fork and spoon.
3. “The Big Bran Hypothesis,” The Big Bang Theory. "If you have time to lean, you have time to clean." Fabulous.
4. “The One Where No One’s Ready,” Friends. What’s not to love about this episode? There are many, many episodes of Friends that I could watch all the time, but this is at the top of my list. Picture Chandler saying, “It’s called ‘get up’” and see if you don’t want to go watch it right now.
5. “The One with the Embryos,” Friends. I think this one’s on the list of a lot of people. This is the trivia episode where Rachel and Monica lose their apartment to Chandler and Joey. I don't think I need to say anymore about it.

And finally, on the television news front, how am I just finding out about hulu? Ok, I found out about a few weeks ago or so and just ventured to look at it yesterday, but still! I love it! Who has two thumbs and is spending her evening watching old episodes of "The Office" and "Newsradio"? This gal.

Thursday, April 03, 2008

I am getting work done. Really.

The things I notice about work don’t involve any actual work. Such as:

The building people have installed automatic flushing toilets that scare the beejebus out of me. It was especially scary the first time I went in there after they had done the install because I didn’t know they’d done it.

The coffee today tastes worse than ever. Didn’t really think that was possible.

My coworker recognizes my footsteps when I go past his door, which I do a lot because his office is right by the break room with the coffee. Apparently, the quickness of the steps and the clomping gives me away. Hey, I have stuff to do, I’m not going to stroll around the office. But I do wish I didn’t sound like an elephant in heels.

The other day, I couldn’t find the Pyrex measuring cup for me to microwave water to make my oatmeal. Several of my coworkers thought it was amusing how panicked I got. The ones that didn’t think it was funny? Also needed to microwave water for oatmeal. The same flavor, even. It’s both comforting and sad how similar some of us.

And, on a final note, there are very strange sounds coming from the ceiling right now. I’m mildly concerned. I would be more concerned, but I don’t want to have to get out of my chair.

I done bobbed my hair

Y’all, I copied RR and cut my hair. And I mean I really copied her, as in I took her with me to her stylist, pointed at her, and said, “I want that hair cut.” It’s not super short, a little past my chin, but it is a tiny bit shorter than RR’s. I think I like it. If I decide I don’t, it will grow back, so it’s no big deal, but I would prefer to definitely like it. I won't know how I feel about it until a few days from now when the new hair cut magic wears off and it starts misbehaving again.

But two people have told me that cutting that much off was “brave.” I . . . don’t know how to take that. Brave because some women don't like to cut their hair? Or brave because maybe it’s not for me? Is it like when my grandmother says something is “interesting”? I just don’t know how to take it when someone sees your new haircut and tells you it was brave for you to get it. But I don't see how it can be good.

On a related note, I broke my round hairbrush last night. I didn’t even notice it at first, I just noticed that it seemed like the handle was a little loose, and the bristles weren’t gripping my hair like they should. Turns out that the handle separated from the bristle part. I tried to hold the two pieces together to dry my hair, but, alas, that does not work so much. This is what happens when you buy the much, much cheaper hairbrush because “why should I spend more money on a hairbrush?” and “how much different can they be?”

And even though my hair is shorter, it takes no less time to dry and style. Boooooo.

Monday, March 24, 2008

A Telegram

Darlings comma what do you think question mark Have bought sewing machine with RR stop Am so thrilled stop Resolved will be successful comma not like photography or horseback lessons stop Feeling so very "Project Runway" right now stop Fabulous full stop

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Why again with the sick?

AGAIN I am sick, this time with a cold. RR's cold. I know she didn't infect me on purpose, and mine didn't get as bad as hers. Hers includes a lovely sinus infection, fever, and the absolute inability to sleep at night at all or for more than a few hours at a time during the day, plus she has so much school work and work work to do that she can't just lay around feeling sorry for herself, which everyone knows is how you get well.

But still! I haven't been able to stay asleep at all for the past five nights, the first four because I kept waking up every few hours to sneeze A LOT and then had trouble getting back to sleep, and last night because I had to go to the bathroom EVERY HOUR, except from 2am-3am. I knew when I was drinking all that water that it would be a mistake, but I figured I'd maybe have to wake up once. Wrong!

Of course, on the upside, when I've woken up at night, at least there's someone to talk to. I'd wake up, sneeze a whole bunch, grumble "you got to be kidding me," and hear a friendly but incredibly sad hello from RR's room.

Most of my congestion has settled on the right side of my head, so it's a little puffy on that side (no, rr and hmc, I did not eat a lot of peanut butter), and also, with all that pressure, my teeth feel like they are about to fall out of my head and my face feels like it's about to just break open. Oh, it hurts. And my precious neti pot can only do so much. I will spare you the details about what's been coming out of my nose.

Today at work, my coworker who is on maternity leave brought her incredibly adorable 2-month old baby for us to see, and everyone got to hold her but me, because I am Contaminated.

I've been eating copious amounts of salsa and tilting my head a lot to the left in the hopes of moving stuff around to ease the pressure. Of course, that makes me sneeze, and also, it's hard to read stuff on your computer screen with your head tilted as far as you can, which makes work slow. So . . . I don't know. All I know is that it's 9pm and I'm really thirsty, so I'm about to go drink a lot of water. So, tonight is shaping up to be great!

But at least I'm not RR. I am complaining because I hate being sick and also because my teeth really, really hurt, my nose is really chapped, and I have to constantly carry around a tissue lest I sneeze something gross on people (people do not forgive you for that) (and then I'd always be that woman who sneezed on them) ("Oh, yeah, I know her. She sneezed on me once. Just sneeeeeezed right on me."). But I know it could be a lot worse (See RR), so I'm also grateful that it's just this bad. But I do feel like I've already served my ear, nose, and throat illness time this year, so I really should have gotten a pass on this one, and on that issue I do think I have a valid point. So, I'll just wrap this up by saying that if I get a similar illness again in the next few months, somebody will take the blame. So just look out.

Sunday, March 02, 2008

I wish I had something interesting to say, but I don't

Hey, y'all. How is every little thing?

I don't have anything exciting to post, so I'm just going to do a hodge-podge. Let's see, first off, today I bought a Jellycat brand Bartlesham Bear for a friend who's wife just had a baby (well, technically the bear is for the baby). This bear was so soft, and made in just the right proportions that I almost couldn't part with him. I wanted to keep him and carry him around everywhere. Le sigh. Parting was such sweet sorrow.

Speaking of buying things, yesterday RR and I went to the Dillard's Clearance Center, and we cleaned up. Like all clearance outlet type places, it's always hit-or-miss shopping there, but yesterday, they had TONS of cute stuff. It was hard to narrow down my purchases. Plus, it was an extra 40% off weekend. Score! RR got a super cute silk shirt that was originally $149—she got it for $16.75. Nothing that I bought was over $10. It was a good day. They even had lots of cute shoes—I almost never get there when they have shoes in my size that are worth buying. I wish that we'd had time to go back today.

Friday night, we ran into a friend at Whole Foods, and she invited us to come over and hang out. She and her husband and kids live about a mile or two down the road, but we hardly ever hang out. It was great to see her—she's really one of the funniest people I've ever met. And . . . she has a Wii. And she let us play it. Bowling and tennis were both fun. And athough it pains me to say this, I must: Guitar Hero is awesome. There. I can hate myself now. Not awesome: I have had Foghat's “Slow Ride” stuck in my head since Friday. I like the song, or I did (and here I profess my affinity for classic rock), but it's driving me crazy. Slow ride. Take it ease-ee.

Also not awesome: our local PBS station is not showng “Emma” tonight. Instead, we get some Sarah Brightman concert or something. Do not want! I really don't like those pledge drives. Show me something I'd actually watch, and I'll donate. Play Daniel O'Donnell or Andre Rieu, and I'm just changing the channel. No offense meant to them, but that's not stuff I tune into PBS to watch—and PBS doesn't seem to play those guys anytime other than pledge drives. I remember back in the old days when they showed things like “Anne of Green Gables” during pledge drives. I'd totally donate if they showed “Anne of Green Gables.“

And that's really all I have to say.

Monday, February 11, 2008

Dear Hershey's, Thanks for Nothing.

Dear Hershey’s,

I just wanted to let you know that I’m not very pleased with you right now. Cadbury creme eggs list "invert sugar" in the ingredient list. Most of the time I've found that "invert sugar" is derived from regular table sugar. But I've also seen people listing corn syrup as an invert sugar. So I emailed you to find out if the “invert sugar” in your Cadbury Creme Eggs [yes, y’all, I know, CADBURY makes the creme eggs, but Hershey’s has the license for the U.S.] is corn syrup or is derived from corn, and then we had a brief, spectacularly uninformative email exchange. I thought you’d be helpful because you had previously answered a question for me about the ingredients in Peanut Butter Cups. I was wrong.

You replied, but your response did not actually answer my question. You said that “invert sugar is a 50/50 mixture of glucose and fructose. It is sweeter than sucrose (table sugar). It's used as a sweetener or humectant. Your interest in our company is appreciated.” I replied that, yes, I know that invert sugar is a mixture of glucose and fructose, but it comes in a variety of forms. For instance, corn syrup is an invert sugar. Is the invert sugar you use corn syrup or derived from corn?

You replied, “We would like to get some additional information in order to provide the service you need. Please call us toll-free at 1-800-468-1714.” Oh, and, “Your interest in our company is appreciated.”

I did not understand this. Why do you need more information? I do not have any information that will help you determine whether or not there is corn in your invert sugar. Only you have that information. So I replied, basically, thanks, but what information do you need, because I can’t imagine why you’d need information from me when I’m just trying to find out if there’s corn in your invert sugar. I have not heard back.

But here’s the deal. I don’t want to call you, because why should I take time out of my day to sit on hold for who knows how long just so I can talk to some guy who doesn’t actually need information from me in order to “provide the service [I] need”? I don’t know what your angle is, but it’s making me not want to buy your products anymore. Especially when you are about to raise your prices anyway. If you don’t want to put that information in writing, that annoys me, but at least if you had told me that, I’d respect your honesty. But this “need more information” line, that’s just a lie, and I can’t go for that. No can do.

[Oh, and incidentally, I also e-mailed people at Cadbury directly, and they never responded at all. So I guess Hershey’s could be worse. What’s up with the British? No customer service over there?]

[I should have known that Hershey's wouldn’t be helpful because they have this statement on their website, in response to the question “Can you send me an allergen list?”:

“We have found that allergen lists quickly become outdated as our product lines change over time. Rather than have you make purchase decisions based on outdated information, we encourage you to check the ingredient label on the package. This label provides accurate, current information about all the ingredients in the package.”

Except that the label does NOT provide information that will help you accurately determine if the product contains something that you’re allergic to, not really. For example, the Hershey’s peanut butter cups list dextrose as an ingredient, and dextrose usually comes from corn, but it doesn't always. And sure enough, the Hershey’s response told me that their dextrose “may be” derived from corn (so now I don’t eat them). But even if you know dextrose usually comes from corn, you don't know for sure if peanut butter cups are off limits, because they don't tell you on the package where the dextrose comes form. And if you don't know that dextrose usually comes from corn, you would assume (incorrectly) that peanut butter cups are ok to eat. Thanks, Hershey's!]

So here’s a suggestion for you and your Cadbury friend. Why don’t you just put a big disclaimer on your website that says, “If you have a food allergy, we are not interested in your business, so don’t even ask us.”

Your interest in my problem is appreciated.


A former customer

Friday, February 08, 2008

Trailer Time!

Y'all, this is my 300th post! I wish I could write something profound, but instead, it's movie trailer time.

So, movies I am planning to see:

To start things on a light note, I really want to see (and you should too--it has Lee Pace and Amy Adams) (and thanks, RR, for pointing it out) Miss Pettigrew Lives For a Day.

In Bruges . RR also pointed this trailer out to me, and we are both counting down until it comes to a theater near us.

SATC. Of course. I hope it's good, but even if it's not, I'll still like watching it.

And, I hate to say it, but I think I want to see Run, Fat Boy, Run

Aaaand I kind of want to see Chaos Theory, but hey, I just love Ryan Reynolds. I even loved “Two Guys and a Girl.”

I don’t particularly want to see Smart People, even though I love Dennis Quaid and SJP, because it looks like one of those “smart people who obey the laws need to learn something from losers” movies (I could be wrong). But the trailer won me over by playing Paul Westerberg. I love that song.

I DO NOT want to see The Accidental Husband because Uma Thurman will be choosing NOT to marry Colin Firth, which no sane woman would do. But the trailer does have “I feel it all,” which I love.

I definitely want to see Persepolis.

I will probably go see Inkheart. I love Brendan Fraser, and I like the “family adventure” genre. Yes, I do, so sue me.

Leatherheads looks charming (George Clooney AND John Krasinski—in a word, fabulous).

Will definitely see Prince Caspian.

I love Michael Caine, so I’ll probably see Flawless.

And, of course, Get Smart.

I think I may have saved the best for last. What I really can’t wait to see is Taken.


At This Point, It's Actually Starting To Get Funny

Three days in a row, y'all. This time, it's coffee pot avec coffee, coagulating on the (on) burner. The coffee, it is not so hot, despite sitting on the burner (and also, it's not so hot in the sense that it's not all that great). About half a pot's worth of coffee is missing, from which I conclude that more than one person has taken coffee from the coffee pot. That means that we have at least two lazy coffee drinkers who can't be bothered to pour the coffee into a carafe and don't care that they are ensuring that coffee that started out mediocre at best will deteriorate even further so that it's potable only by adding lots and lots of half and half. Or (giving them the benefit of the doubt as to their motivations) at least two people who have never considered that maybe that carafe is there for a reason.

So now I'm really starting to think someone truly is messing with me. It's becoming kind of a joke for me--what will I find when I go into the break room today? A little something to break up the monotony of the day. I do fancy myself to be a bit of a Nancy Drew, after all. There aren't that many people in this office, and not all of them drink coffee, so I really think I can figure out who it is. And then? The messor will become the messee.

Thursday, February 07, 2008

Ok, Now They're Just Messing With Me

Empty coffee carafe? Check.
Coffee burner on? Check.
Empty coffee pot cookin' away on the burner? Check.

Yes, they say, I will see your coffee congealing on the burner and raise you potential exploding shards of glass (again).

I know you are tired of hearing about it, and frankly, I'm tired of talking about it, but I really don't understand it at all. In a way, I wish that I could be a different person and just leave the pot there and see what happens. But there are pregnant women that use that break room, plus, if the coffee pot caught on fire, the fire alarm would go off. They'd make us evacuate, and I'd have to go down the stairs, and I hate those stairs. For some reason (I'm sure it was a good one), they don't follow the usual pattern of flight of stairs, new floor, flight of stairs, new floor, or even flight of stairs, landing, flight of stairs, new floor. It's more like five steps, landing, turn, five steps, landing, turn, five steps, landing, turn, five steps, landing, turn, congratulations, you're down one floor! Five steps, turn, five steps, turn . . . just thinking about it makes me feel nauseated. Bleck.

Also, despite the several fire drills that we've had, I'm still not sure where we are supposed to meet to check in with our floor "check people in so we know who's still in the building" person. This is because when we have fire drills, I just go home. I tell a coworker to check me in, and I walk to the garage. I'm not a slacker, I just take the drill as a sign that I'm not supposed to be at work that day. I do work from home once I get there, but I'm in my jammies, so it's better. But if we had an actual fire, I'd feel compelled to personally check in so that firefighters weren't looking for me inside the building, but I wouldn't know where to go for that. That could result in awkwardness as I try to explain why, after working here for a year and a half, I don't know the procedure, and that's why everyone thought I was still in my office.

Anyway, point is, I can't leave the coffee pot smoldering. So . . . I don't know. I'm going back to the stake out plan.

Wednesday, February 06, 2008

Coffee. Pot. Burner. Whatevs.

It happened again. Coffee pot, full of coffee minus one cup, sitting on the (on) burner, because no one bothered to pour it into the carafe, which would have taken all of 10 seconds. I'm kind of resigned to it now because I think I know who did it, and if I'm right, there's nothing I can do about it. But it's still annoying.

Weird Electricity Goings On

So, last night, my hair dryer started making this weird clicky, ‘bout-to-catch-fire sound while I was using it. Also, when I was making my yummy grilled cheese sammich for dinner, this weird high-pitched squealing noise started coming from the general direction of the stove top. Was it the stove? The pan? The sandwich? I don’t know (but I ate the sandwich). Then, RR tells me that when she was using the microwave during the day, it kind of flashed on and off a few times.

WTH, y’all? I’m afraid of our townhouse now.

Also, I’m buying a new hair dryer in case it’s not that I have a poltergeist and the hair dryer is actually going to catch fire the next time I use it. Any recommendations?

Thursday, January 31, 2008

Had Enough of Winter, Bring on the Spring.

I don't like the winds we've been having lately. Yesterday? Winds about 30mph, gusting up to 50mph. FIFTY! This is not one of those cold, windy places, thanks, that's why I live here. I don't like the wind that makes you look like you're in a cartoon, where you're walking, leaning forward, but literally moving nowhere (except maybe backwards). Today, while making an ill-advised trip outside, a coworker had to grab me to keep me from blowing across the street (she's quite athletic, and I'm so not).

But that's not what I wanted to talk about. I wanted to talk about how I don't like our new heating pad.

So, I don’t like our new heating pad. First of all, instead of having the old fashioned knobby-do or dial or such thing, it has a button to press that moves it up from one heating level to the next, and somehow I’m always pressing it one time too many, and then I have to go all the way around so that I’m clicking from low to medium-low to medium-high to high to low to medium-low (which is the setting that I want). And I click too fast multiple times, so it’s more like click-click- click-click- click-click- click-click- click-click- click-click- click-click- click-click- click-click- click-click- click-click- click-click-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-click-click-FINE-WHATEVER.

I’m pretty sure that I could press another button to go back down a level without having to go all the way back around, but somehow I can’t get it to work that way. I just get stuck in this loop in which I think I will be clicking forever.

Anyway, I also don’t like that it turns itself off automatically. Usually I’m very much in favor of any electrical heating implement that turns itself off. But I’m not worried that I’m going to fall asleep with this on my face and wake up with a burnt forehead or anything. This heating pad is for my cat. We use it to assuage the guilt we feel from keeping our home at near-freezing temperatures (and also to keep him walking around crying and from stalking us around, waiting for us to stay still long enough for him to attach himself to one of us). We put the heating pad on the medium-low setting and put it under his blanket in his favorite chair, and then he gets all warm and happy, and this makes him SHUT.THE.HELL.UP. And that makes the rest of us happy. But now I have to keep running downstairs to make sure it’s still on so that he’ll be quiet and not freeze to death downstairs.

So I’m not liking it a lot. But at this moment, right now, it’s still on, and That Cat has finally finally stopped sounding like I’m strangling him. So I’m going to go take my shower before he notices that I’m the bathroom a/k/a the one and only warm room in this place. That’s right, Wally. Waaaarm blankie.

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

I can't even concentrate long enough to come up with a title for this post

So, I’ve decided that I need to get one document drafted a week, every week for the foreseeable future. That probably doesn’t sound like a big deal to you, and because I try to keep this anonymous-ish, and because in my line of work (as with many people), too much detail is verboten, I can’t explain to you why my goal is almost impossible. I can tell you that everyone I work with who I've told about my goal has said, basically, "yeah, that's not going to happen" or "have you had a stroke?" But I’m going to give it a try because I’m ridiculously behind, more work that isn’t supposed to be my responsibility but keeps becoming my responsibility is dumped on my desk almost daily, and it’s making me anxious and a little depressed. At night I basically go home and do nothing but sit around worrying. That, and eat a ton of food. And that’s making me gain weight, which is making me feel even more stressed out.

So to make myself feel a little more in control, I’m setting for myself this schedule. Hopefully, that will mean that I have more time to hang around the ‘net. I know, that doesn’t sound like it makes sense. But when I feel behind at work, I just can’t bring myself to read other people’s blogs or work on my own, because I just keep thinking that I should be working, so even when I’m not working, I’m thinking about working and unable to do anything else. So if I’m putting in 80 hour weeks at work, well, then, I know that’s plenty of time, so when I get home, if I want to be in the Internet, I can, guilt free. Make sense?

Also, I’m going to spend about $600, minimum, on new tires today, and boy howdy, that makes me sad.

In other news, THOROUGHLY SICK of my template. I’ve loved having it, but I think it’s time for something new. Emma has offered, gosh, I don’t know, roughly a hundred times to help me with a new one, but the thought of having to make decisions throws me into a state of mild panic.

I’m picturing an exchange that would go something like--

Her: Let’s start with an easy question. What color would you like the background to be?


Her: oooookaaay [pause while she adds me to the block list in her email]

Or, alternatively:

Her: Let’s start with an easy question. What color would you like the background to be?

Me [very quickly]: Good question. I was thinking a blueish color, but maybe like a whitish blue, you know, like, not dark blue, obviously, because I want the text to show, but you know, maybe a soothing blue, like the sky, but not like the sky on a really blue day, you know what I mean? I don’t know, what do you think? ‘Cause maybe a white with blue undertones would be better. Or just white? Or brown. Like a tan, a light tan, just a really neutral brownish beige-y color. With blue edges. I don’t know. What was the question?

Her: oooookaaay [pause while she adds me to the block list in her email]

So I haven’t gone anywhere with that yet. Just looking at my blog makes me feel disappointed in my time management skills. Sad for me!

And now, back to work.

And there was much rejoicing (yeeaaaa). . .

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Apparently, I'm falling apart

So apparently, I haven’t posted anything since before Christmas. I took a bit of a holiday break, and then I have not posted anything lately because RR won’t get off of my computer at night.

Ok, actually it’s because I’ve been catching up on Project Runway and baking, but I will blame it on RR because it’s probably good for her to take the blame for stuff. Develops character.

So, I went to the doctor on Monday for my yearly “please please please renew my Nexium and don’t make me go back for more tests involving sticking tubes down my throat because that just made me throw up” visit, and when my doctor asked me if I needed my Nexium refilled, I said “no, I don’t need it.”

WHAAAAAT? What what? ?!!???!!!?? Why did that come out of my mouth? Oh, and the other medicine I went to get renewed, my allergy medicine, I didn’t even mention that I needed more Nasonex, and when she told me that Zyrtec was going generic, did I ask her for a prescription for something that wasn’t generic? No, I did not. What the hell is wrong with me, y’all? No, please, don’t give me the medicine that makes me stop sneezing all day or the medicine that stops me from feeling like someone is taking a metal file and shaving off bits of my stomach lining. I DON’T NEED IT.

So. Not the most productive doctor’s visit I’ve ever had. Now I’m trying to come up with a way to say that I do actually need my medicine without sounding like I’ve just discovered that I can make money by selling my prescriptions on the black market.

In other news, It’s Cold. Yes, it’s January, so I should expect it to be cold, but it’s been so pleasant lately that I’m not used to the cold. And really, it’s not so much the temperature, which is only in the 30s, it’s the really freakin’ cold wind. The walk into work this morning, not so much fun. Normally, under these circumstances, I would have sprinted to work (well, sprinted, stopped, wheezed, sprinted some more, stopped, caught my breath, wheezed some more, walked quickly, sprinted for about 5 steps, etc), but I couldn’t this morning because, oh, yeah, I have an ingrown toenail.

The hell? Ingrown toenail? That hardly seems fair! I do not cut my toenails too short! I’m very careful about that kind of thing. Fat lot of good that did me. Apparently, my particular affliction came about because my big toe and the toe immediately next to it (index toe?) were rubbing together. Boooooo. And I had to go get antibiotics for it because my toe looks very, very angry right now. It’s all inflamed on the side, raised skin and very red, with a white spot on it that is hopefully NOT filled with pus (ew, gross). Why do I have so many foot problems? Isn’t it bad enough that I have arch problems that prevent me from wearing super cute shoes? Why are you punishing me, God? WHHYYYYYYYYYYY?????!!???

So anyway, today I’m wearing ugly shoes that emphasize the fact that I have clown feet because these shoes are the only ones I have that don’t squeeze my foot. Thrilled about that.

Allergies are bad today. The bad weather that blew in brought something with it that, apparently, I’m quite allergic to. And I forgot to take my allergy medicine this morning because I’m an idiot. I did use my neti pot, but that was only marginally helpful. I’ve been a fan of the neti pot for a few years now, and it really does provide relief from the overwhelming sinus pressure that I’d had for so long before I started using it. But even the magic neti pot was no match for my allergies this morning. It helped, but it didn’t solve everything.

In work news, I got a lot done on Monday and Tuesday (finally! yeesh.), less so yesterday through no fault of my own (no, actually, Boss, I do NOT have time to run with you to Starbucks after our 2 hour lunch, but I’m too chicken to tell you that, so, yes, please, let’s go, I would be happy to walk more on my angry toe, actually, yes, this mocha is yummy, but OW OW OW aaaaand the day is over), and today looks to be almost a total wash out. On account of the allergies, I’m sitting here basically in a stupor. Like, just now, a coworker came to talk to me, and it took all of my available energy not to just lay my head down on my desk while she was talking to me. I’m having Qdoba for lunch and having them put spicy stuff on my burrito bowl thing, so that hopefully will be conducive to drainage. Make mine chicken with a side of yummy!

So, what’s going on with y’all?