I just realized that my pattern of swapping cardigans and shoes when I get to work means that (a) on my way to and from work, the top half of my body is stylin’ but my feet look frumpy, but while I’m at work it’s the exact opposite and (b) this means that there is never any part of my work day when I look put-together. I always look at least mildly frumpy. Even on days where I wear a suit because on those days, I take off my suit jacket as soon as I get to my office and put on my office sweater. My totally cute shoes are always offset by my baggy, wrinkled cardigan while I’m at work, which by the way pretty much covers up most of my outfit. And my when I’m not rockin’ the dad sweater, I’m wearing old lady nurse shoes (because I have old lady nurse feet, so I can wear cute shoes at work because I rarely get my sit-me-down-upon out of my chair, and when I’m in my office I take off my shoes anyway, but for walking, comfort rules).
So if you walked into my office wanting to hire an attorney, you would have a lot of confidence that the person behind the desk was someone who lives in her car and who is only in the office because she broke in to use the computer to troll the comments section of online news articles.
Well, I take it back. For the few hours of every week that I have to be in court, I look reasonably close to “like a lawyer.” I say only reasonably close because let’s be honest, it’s me, and if I remembered to put on eye shadow and lipstick or woke up in time to do my hair, it’s a minor miracle. I’d like to think that if I actually had to interact with the public every day, this would be a different story, but I really can’t say that with any conviction.
As an aside, I might need to hire a lawyer later today because the document I’m trying to read and summarize is propped up on my laptop/docking station, and it keeps sliding down toward me, and I push it up, and it slides back down, and I swear if it doesn’t stay put then I WILL KILL SOMEONE.
I would totally hire someone that looked frumpy, though, because even though I look like I don’t have my stuff together, lawyer-wise, I’m actually kind of awesome.* The appearances, they can be deceiving.
*when I’m not having focus issues, and if it doesn’t involve me getting out of my chair.