Sunday, January 30, 2011

Run normal! This would be the path where normal people run! The weird triathlete training complex is somewhere else! Ok? Run normal here!

Thank heavens that Januay is almost over. This has not been the greatest month of my life. I probably shouldn't complain because it could have been worse. But it certainly could have been better. Just as an example: one day last week, when I was trying very hard to get to work on time, I got stuck in traffic that had not been reported in any of the traffic reports on the radio. Then, when I got to work, I got stuck in the elevator. It was only for about 10 minutes, and it wasn't crowded, so it could have been worse, but still. That's not how you want to start your day. The rest of the day was better, but that's all I can say about it--it was better than being stuck in an elevator.

Also this month: had to replace all four tires on my car. One of my tires was completely flat when I went to leave work one day, and the other three were apparently pretty worn out. Also, I think I might have a cold. And that's just the least of my January troubles.

So I think maybe January is out to get me.

But looking on the bright side, the weather this weekend was beautiful. That's what I love about winter in Texas--it's January, and it's sunny and warm. Seriously warm--it was 70°F (21C) this weekend. Of course the high on Wednesday is supposed to be 28°F (-2C), so it won't last long. But then it's supposed to be back up into the 50s by next weekend. This could be January's last try at killing me, since my body tends to freak out when the temperature fluctuates this much. Nice try, January, but I'm not going down that easily--I'm used to feeling crappy! Never give up, never surrender!

At least I get to work from home on Thursday and Friday to avoid Super Bowl traffic. I'm not at all excited that the Super Bowl is hosted here this year. This would be a really cool event if I liked football, but I don't, at least not professional football, so it just means that a bunch of drunk crazy people will be driving around my neighborhood this weekend. My plan is to not leave my house for four days. It will probably turn out just like when a big winter storm blows in every year threatening to leave ice all over the roads, which, if it turned out as bad as the weather forecasters said, would leave us all iced in for several days since we don't have the equipment to clear the roads. So we all rush to the store to buy milk and toilet paper, and then it doesn't ice over at all. I always hate those days. I feel so let down. One Monday this month everyone was grumpy at work because bad weather had been predicted, and we had all expected to not have to go into work, but then the bad weather blew in early and just ruined our weekend instead. I think that's probably how the Super Bowl thing will go down. Not that it will blow in early. I mean I'm preparing for the apocalypse and in reality, traffic (and crowds at the grocery store) probably won't be that bad.

But I'm still going to work from home on those days because I like to work in my pjs. Also: no judgment on how much coffee I drink, and on a related note, nobody noticing how many trips to the bathroom I make. I swear my coworker across the hall keeps tabs on how many time I go. I don't think he can help it, I would too if the person across the hall from me was constantly popping in and out of his or her office, but still, it makes me feel weird about it. I am tempted to say to him, "yes, that's right, I have to pee again," but I don't in case he hasn't actually noticed how many times I leave my office, but he will in the future if I point it out to him. Also, I'm pretty sure saying "pee" is kind of vulgar. At least, we weren't allowed to say it growing up, so I feel like a 8 year-old boy every time I do say it. But my usual expression wouldn't have the same oomph, because saying that I need to "step across the hall" would, in this case, be a little vague, so I'd have to say something like, "yes, that's right, I have to 'step across the hall' again, and not to make copies or get more coffee or check my mail, if you know what I mean, and I think you do." I think we can all agree that it would be better to just say nothing.

Ok, I just sneezed so hard that I gave myself a serious headache. I officially hate January.

Speaking of hate, in jogging news, I can jog an entire mile now. A slow, plodding, angry mile, but a mile is a mile, and I'm pretty proud of myself. The first two times we went a whole mile, I thought, "hey, this isn't hard at all," except for the part where RR and I realized that we ran like (and were kind of dressed like) Joe from If Lucy Fell, and we started laughing at how ridiculous we must look. It's hard to run when you're laughing. Plus, we jogged past a big puddle of water that was, I swear, shaped exactly like Africa, which was, for some reason, hilarious. Probably because we were short on oxygen at that point. But yeah, it wasn't bad.

But every time since then, I've hated every step. I'm guessing that this isn't going to change and that when I get up to two miles, I'll still feel the same way about it, except I'll be angry for twice as long. But I'm sticking it out. When I get to the end of my jog, I get that weird feeling in my legs that you get when you are no longer in control of some part of your body, but that only lasts for a few minutes, and I'm pretty sure that means I'm doing it right. Right?

And by the way, I think people who run form some kind of weird cult-type thing, because everyone I know who runs is super excited that I've taken it up. My coworker who is training for a marathon, despite hating running, is always telling me how great I'm doing and giving me tips to keep going. My doctor was practically beside herself when I told her I'd started, and she mentioned that she and her nine year-old grandson ran the Turkey Trot this past November. A grandmother and a child can run more than I can. I'm going to choose to think of that as inspirational instead of really depressing.

If anyone has any tips on how to stop hating running, or how to keep running in spite of the hate, please pass them along.


RR said...

"A grandmother and a child can run more than I can." Well, when you put it that way, I feel downright pathetic.

Way to go JLR and RR! That's it, I'm jogging a 1.1 miles today, just to feel better about myself.

JLR said...

I have a feeling you'll be jogging that last .1 by yourself, unless my legs just decide to keep going by themselves.